letting go

seems I fail
at letting go
of past hurts
speak of leaving them behind
yet hold them to me tight
picking at the scabs
making them bleed

putting the past
behind me
forgiving
and
forgetting …
so much easier
if the past doesn’t
creep up
and grab me
by the ankle
pulling me back in

it’s just this small thing
just this tiny thing
but magnified
’til those past hurts
are right now
sore and stinging
with unfairness
and confusion

I have to learn
this letting go
remember
what I have
here in my hand
this golden
precious
love-filled future
where pasts are merely
stories
of a different time
and
now
is all
that matters

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15 thoughts on “letting go

  1. If you’re not already practicing sitting, it really does help with the letting go. But it is kind of like quitting any bad habit. It never completely goes away.
    You have the right attitude.
    “I have realized that the past and future are real illusions, that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is.”
    —Alan Watts

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  2. How do you let go of what has shaped you into this moment of here and now? Perhaps it is not letting go at all that is needed – just accepting that what was is past and tomorrow is waiting…

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  3. the first step in ‘letting go’ is that muscular little exercise you just wrote about: the awareness that you are not letting go – and even picking the scabs – means you have already started to let go and maybe, even, to start liking that kid who won’t let go; easily; I liked her …

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  4. With you there, Blue-Goo. You talk very earnestly about things I can’t really understand, but I feel your feelings I think. But you wouldn’t be who you are without the past, and the expectations of the future wouldn’t be as glorious. I hope you live in the glory.

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