I am sat alone in a room. Sat on a quite squashy sofa. I think it might be a sofa bed, oddly. This is meant to be a meeting of the Disability and Wellbeing Network at my work. I’m the only one here this time. I could feel sad that these meetings aren’t quite taking…… Continue reading Meditation
I am here but not here unfocused in this world full of people and noise I am here but not here bubble-wrapped among crowds separate alone I am here but not here a puppet pretending to be human yet vacant
in this maelstrom I flounder everything spins nothing will hold still moons become blue moons unexpected endocrine insanity and the tiredness drags at me like claws pulling at my flesh I try to hold on to you but you’re behind glass swirling in a maelstrom of your own and I’m making it worse
I feel a strange contentment Sitting here alone I wonder why it doesn’t Always feel this way What is it in me that Craves company one day Then revels in solitude the next?
A moment of pure panic Breath comes fast Tears push against closed lids Hands shake I find myself rocking gently As the sobs come Holding myself tightly And trying to conjure up a comforting voice Hush now, hush now Everything’s going to be alright
Mums And occasional dads Talk among themselves Waiting I stand alone as usual On the edges Still an outsider After nearly 10 years Perils of the working mum Irregular visitor of the school gates And most likely the only one Writing poetry as I wait The lull before the storm When all the children pour…… Continue reading School Gates
worthless worth less than nothing a walking shadow unseen devoid of value like a currency where you need a billion notes to buy a can of coke nothing no thing not even a thing grabbing at scraps begging for leftovers and nobody cares
a leafripped from its treenow flying in the windflutters higher and lowercaught by the currentsin the air no choice in where it goestossed and batteredby the gustsas the wind dies downit falls from the airdrifting down until itslying on the pavementpeople walk over itnot seeing it thereit’s invisibledrying out and turning into a leafy skeletona shadow of…… Continue reading A Leaf