Orchid in the dark

IMG_8179-2-1The weather today is really unpleasant. Windy and rainy and cold. So no chance to get out much. Not that I had the energy for a walk really as I had a migraine yesterday so today I’m kind of delicate and rather drained. I thought I’d have a go at getting a shot of my orchid against a black background, and as I have a black sofa, that was what I used. Turned out though that the sofa was reflecting all the light in the room, so in the end I got the focus right with the light on, then switched it off and took the photo on a long exposure. I like the effect 🙂

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Time Lapse First Attempt

This is my rather scrappy first attempt at a time lapse video. There are several problems with it … it’s too dark, there’s not a lot of action, and I didn’t do it for long enough … but … it’s something I’ve never done before and I’m learning, so I’m quite pleased it actually worked atall! It’s kind of fiddly as my camera doesn’t have an interval timer built in, so I had to have my laptop attached and control my camera via the Canon EOS Utility software … and then I put them together in Windows Movie Maker afterwards. It was cold and dark in the gardne and I ended up having to rush indoors as it started raining! I would like to do this again in better conditions. I’d love to try it on a sunset.

beacon

in ink black night
I saw you
bright as neon
shining beacon
of home
I scrambled
over rocks
to reach you
through brambles
chest high
and now we rest
in calmer seas
and the taste
of you lingers
on my lips
in sleep

remember this …

when darkness falls
as thick as death
and all you see
is in your head

when ice surrounds
as cold as night
and all you feel
is frozen numb

when everything’s
impossible
and all you do
is just exist

remember this …

the light will come
hope will return
your heart will thaw
this will be won

your soul is strong
your mind is tough
you will emerge
transformed and bright

you’re not the dark
you’re not the ice
they are not you
be free, take flight


this isn’t everything you are
breathe deeply in the silence
no sudden moves
this isn’t everything you are
just take the hand that’s offered
and hold on tight
this isn’t everything you are
there’s joy not far from here
I know there is
this isn’t everything you are

Snow Patrol – This Isn’t Everything You Are

night sky (a Cywydd Llosgyrnog)

observing a distant bright star
imagining something so far
in the tar black of the sky
meteor shower and comet
the emptiness of the dark split
and night lit up as they fly

 

This is an attempt at an Cywydd Llosgyrnog, which is a form of Welsh poetry, inspired by Bruce watching Stargazing Live.

Photo from Wikipedia. Taken by fir0002 | flagstaffotos.com.au

old habits

rows of houses
stare blankly at empty streets
cold orange street lights
hazed with drizzly halos
well-worn pavements
reflect their dismal glow
warm breath on dark air
clouding my eyes
old habits die hard

why?

why must it come at me now
with its dark draining uselessness
why must it pull me down
into its weed-choked watery depths

the mirror reflects my sad eyes back at me
my sad ungrateful eyes that should be smiling
how can they be so fickle and foolish
when you are there reflected beside them

I’m afraid to let you look at me and see into my soul
where brightness and light should be there is gloom
anxiety and insecurity have stolen centre stage
and pushed contentment and joy out into the wings

I am tired, old, ugly, fat, moody
I am useless, no good at anything
I am pointless, hopeless, get everything wrong
I am hard on myself, but it all seems quite true

and yet

you love this face, you love this body, you love me
so why can’t I love myself?

writing myself a bedtime story

just one more, my fingers beg
as they caress the keys
my mind has flown away again
so digits have control

no birds to fly with in the night
my mind is swooping with bats
and bathing in pools of moonlight
as curious glowing eyes of sheep
reflect the light like freakish
floating marbles hovering near grass
and gentle stars glow from
many light years away, all cold and distant
and if I stare for long enough
I may catch one’s demise from stardom

back on the keyboard the pads of fingers
dance a jig that magically results in words
and momentarily my mind returns to wonder
how it is that I can link to my fingers in this way
from thought to typed word on the screen
without a moment spent considering the position
of the qwertyuiop
and barely a moment spent in thought
these thoughts do not so much as register
or get a pondering before they show themselves
on screen

my mind is gone again
this time swooping low over the hillsides
enjoying itself by gathering speed uphill
and flinging itself skywards with momentum
and tumbling head over heels
though as it is merely a mind without body
it surely has no head or heels to tumble over

mind stuck on that difficult concept
the fingers once again take over
as they consider the smoothness of the keys
and the warmth of the laptop
quietly humming to itself
patiently humouring the poetic digits
‘quite insane of course’ it mutters
‘but mostly harmless so we’ll let them carry on’

and the headless heelless mind is soaring higher
trying to touch the moon
and catch a trail of stardust
drifting softly cross the dark
and watching as the dots of light
marking houses in the lanes and valleys
slowly turn off one by one
as people fall asleep
and other minds come join it there
as the dreaming starts
while bodies sleep all sound in beds
the minds take flight with joy
and folk who never speak in life
skydance their minds above the treetops

the fingers getting weary now
contemplate the dreamers
and wonder if they ought to join
so slowly, very slowly they draw the nonsense to an end
and gradually a silence falls
without the tap of tips on keys
without the sound of thumb on space
and all there is is gentle breaths
as blue girl softly slips to sleep
her worries drifted far away

just the slight niggle of a thought as she goes
‘I’ve really gone and done it this time, no doubt I’m loopy now’

goodnight, sleep tight x

safe

you wrote me home
your words flowing
from you as I drove
and I imagine them
flying cross country
faster than light
and gathering round
my moving car
like a blanket of poetry
keeping me safe in the dark

night leaves

turning leaves smoulder in the night
despite dark masking them from view
the blackness seems to stifle life
and smother all the light and good
but still the smoky mists drift up
from changing burning foliage
the embers simmer darkly there
until the lick of morning’s tongue
creeps over the horizon bare
and trees ignite, inflame the sky
cimmerian gloom defeated

with grateful thanks to m lewis redford for the inspiration – the first line, in italics, is all his

Thawing

thawing now
the feeling returns
like blood rushing
back into frozen fingers
and my grateful heart
swelling in my chest
sees the kind friends
looking with concern
across the press of words
and the constant love
from you, my everything
and I know
I am something, I am someone
and I can fight this
dark hole inside of me
and shrink it until
it is the nothing, not me