This is all the time I have.The rest of my time is stolen away.I am timeless.I am a half-life, half-asleep,blog-posting through a blur of fatigue.My edges are unclear. My face a smear as I slide down the glasslooking out at those with lives.Wondering how they capture timeand make it bend.
Me and my daughter went to the zoo today. Quite the trip at about 1 3/4 hour’s drive each way. I am in a lot of pain right now but I enjoyed it very much. I’m not going to let fibro win, so I will still do stuff that makes me happy, never mind theContinue reading “Giraffes!”
I like to try and live in harmony with nature. Even if I was able to work hard getting my garden all perfect and neat, I don’t think I would want to. What I really want is a bit of the wild countryside that’s easier to access being right outside my door. I want toContinue reading “Wildlife Welcome”
Today I put clean covers on everyone’s beds, as well as doing a bunch of washing, doing quite a lot of (secret) crochet, and taking my daughter to her riding lesson. May not sound much but I’m exhausted now, especially after poor sleep and feeling a bit icky today. So I am feeling proud ofContinue reading “Simple achievements”
Today contained a fair bit of pain and bone-tiredness, but it also contained moments of joy. One of these was looking at plants with my daughter in a shop in town. We walked out into the outside area where the plants are and pretty much the first thing I saw was an Anemone! Just theContinue reading “Anemone”
I’ve been in pain now for almost 5 years. I have days when I rail against it, days when I feel depressed and hopeless, days when I wonder what is the point and how I will keep going. But… pain has given me some gifts too. Pain has showed me how strong I am. HowContinue reading “Pain”
Well, it’s been a while since my last dragonfly photo, and I was feeling the lack of it. Lately I’ve taking a lot of photos of horses and ponies and hadn’t had much opportunity for other smaller creatures. However this weekend I’ve been pottering round the garden taking photos, then this morning felt I hadContinue reading “Here be Dragons”
… this: Can you see? Can you tell I have it? Is there any visible clue? OK sometimes you might see me walking awkwardly, or you might catch a grimace on my face, but most of the time the answer is no, you can’t tell there’s anything wrong with me. Same goes for various otherContinue reading “Fibromyalgia looks like…”
I am a hermit, curled tight in my shell. Face pressed into the warmth of my creativity. I cannot rise above perpetual pain to be your beacon in the night. The world is larger than my mind can stretch. You will move beyond to the stars.
light diffused through thin curtains muscles burn, bone weary not-even twilight as I wait for sleep just another day just another way in which I struggle to live fully, widely foolishly hoping for respite endlessly pushing onward towards some invisible goal because that’s just what you do, right? just keep moving until moving is noContinue reading “Early night”