Then and now

I held you in my arms
exhausted but triumphant
a tiny baby
grown in me
each feature
perfectly formed
the overwhelming wonder
the rush of protective love
the fearful anticipation
what now?

Now looking up
as you tower over me
how did those years pass so fast?
I can no longer rock you in my arms
I cannot sing you lullabies
(so embarrassing)
but my love is as fierce as ever
and you are just as precious
and my only wish
is for your happiness
for your life to be full and content
as you step out
control your destiny
choose your direction
and I will be there
in the background
cheering you on
and lifting you up
with every breath

Happy 18th Birthday to my son x



when you’re talking
I get distracted
by your eyes
and the infinities
inside them
the wonder
of your existence
made within me
years ago
and I have to
shake myself
and listen

for my son

my child
even as you grow
in age
in height
in shoe size!
know this
you are still
my baby boy
and despite
your need for privacy
your shrinking from
kiss hug hair-tidies
I think of you
I love you
you are worth
earth moon and stars
you are precious
perfectly you
as you are
and as you will be
believe me
believe in yourself

mothers day

mothers day
slipped by
without fanfare
just with
buttons stuck
on a cupcake
made of card
and felt
in blue of course
just for me
and your face
earnestly shining
for approval
and I know
there is no need
for fuss
my children’s
happy smiles
laughs and hugs
and silly giggly nonsense
are my reward
and pleasure